Who’s Life Are You Living?

(Originally posted on 5/2/2016)

Life Story

Whose life are you living?

This is a question that I heard bouncing around in my head this morning. And one I now realize I will ask myself often.

Whose life are you living?

I find myself getting so caught up in the day to day activities that I forget to check in on the choices I am making.

Are they my choices?

Am I making choices out of comfort of what I know?

Or am I making bold strokes with my choices?

Meaning, am I listening to that inner voice or muse that is asking for something outside of routine?

Am I making choices based upon what I think someone else would like me to make?
That’s a good one there.

Am I making choices because something or someone else told me to make that choice?

The one I keep coming back to though is; am I making choices just out of familiarity?

Conditioning is a bitch. It can and usually does become the mode in which we operate in.
It is in our nature to desire being liked, loved, included, wanted, so we follow the conditioned paths everyone else has chosen.

At least I see where I chose this in my life more and more when I allow myself to step back and have a look at it.

Whose life am I living?

Am I living some hodgepodge conglomerate of all of the conditions that have been laid out before me?

Or am I braving the path that no one else is on because that is what my muse is telling me to do?

There isn’t a person on this planet that can answer that for me but me.

Isn’t it funny though how we can shift that thought process into the light of conditioning?

How we can justify the reasons why we didn’t do this or that? And that makes it ok somehow?

That by choosing the reasons why we didn’t choose to do our thing, our way,
the same way everyone else does, justifying the conditioned direction it makes, it is somehow more acceptable?

I know, try that sentence again. LOL!!

But you know. I know. There is a missing amount of energy in that. A hole in our being that is just begging to be filled. But it doesn’t get filled right? At least those holes I create in my life don’t get filled, until I chose to fill them with the matching energy.

So this little writing I am doing here is winding its way back to fulfillment.

Living our life, making our choices is fulfillment.

When we choose to live it any other way, it leads away from fulfillment towards dis-ease, discomfort, disillusionment, weight gain, depression. I find in those moments I end up making choices to fill those holes with the conditions that are easily available. Grabbing fast food, sugary drinks, TV shows where I don’t have to look at the missed paths that for whatever reason I chose against. Choosing anything to fill the hole so I don’t have to feel the hole right then.

But that hole will not get filled until I chose to fill it with what it is just asking to be filled with. It is begging for my attention! It is begging for you attention! It is there saying; “dude, I know you don’t know how this turns out if you chose me, but I promise you, you don’t have to know to choose!”

Trust your muse. That is what I hear.

What happens when I do?

For me, that is when the magic happens. And that is when I no longer feel the need to fill the hole with something other than the energy that truly matches it.

Whose life are you living?

What if it began to be my life always?

What if your life began to be yours?


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